Friday, April 29, 2011

You (My personal best till now)

None but I rule here,
Fires and pits of tar I will make you bear,
I walk these lands with my trident in my hand,
My tail swishing left, right, center and making markings in the sand.

I remember Him. Well. Very Well.
He was tall, dark and rugged looking.
I guess you youngsters might call Him Eastwood,
But I think I'll call Him "I".

And I and I used to walk on the gardens of Elysium,
And He and I used to carry Zeus, Poseidon and Hades.
I loved Hades. He was a good kid. Always obedient.
But He. He loved Zeus. Because Zeus was like Him.

Powerful.

And He and I had our fights. And we loved.
And we fought.
And I lost.

Then I got tired, and built my own kingdom.
And while He knew, He never complained.
He just used to tell me, "Balance, my child."

Hah!! I used to laugh on His face.
But now I realise his true intent.
But that is past, and none can be done or regretted.

And I ruled over my roost for ages. And ages past.
And ages beyond. And ages not thought of.

And none I ever saw like me.

But then I met You.
I looked at you, and you laughed at me.
You.
You laughed at me.
I said,
"Vinay, don't laugh, you foolish one.
I am the king of my hearth,
And the owner of my lands.
I will burn you till eternity."

And You only said,
"I'm not with Her.
She is not with me.
How does anything else matter?
Is any other punishment as painful?"

I hate Vinay.
I really do.
He put me in a spot that none could.

As Mclean said,
No angel of hell could break my spell.
I really thought none could.

But then I had to meet Vinay. He showed me.
He held me, and said,
"Someday, I hope you are with someone you love.
The way I will be in some time."

And she came up one day.
All gold, and glittering,
And white feathers.

Dedication - Vinay said.
And he simply looked at me, and smiled,
And went away to her.
I looked, and could not stop him.

And now I want Him.
I want You.
You are so many.
You are so much.
You are all I want. Nothing more.
Nothing less.

And that's just not Satan speaking.

- Vinaykrishnan.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

You.

That my love had nothing to gain, but your eyes forever;
That my say had nothing insane, but you forever,
Insanity they say ruled what I had in love,
But I only wanted to breathe you,
And dance in the rhythm of your music,
And revel in the ecstasy of your tone,
But none of this that happened,
Now I just feel the need for you in my life.
And she can say I'm sexy, or that I look really awesome...
And I think she does too...
But nothing like you,
And nothing like me liking you,
For whom the sweetest of the paraphrases do I do.

Enlightenment. It's like Nirvana from the Boddhisatva.
Swami.
Devi.
I live in your embrace.
I die in your love.

I am yours.

Truly.

- Vinaykrishnan.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The Hero (part IV)

Heroism, I had heard, was not only about courage or strength. Intelligence was a key factor too. Choosing your battles was as important as fighting them.

This time, I knew I had to be on my alert as I try to pull this off. Nothing fancy. Just trusting luck to do it's thing. Usually, with me, Lady Luck never liked the color of my gold coins. I was hoping she'd love it this time.

I dashed to my right. The beast spotted me rush right, and took a step towards it's left to crouch, and pounced.

And it fell to the ground with a earth-shaking thud.

It's right foot was caught in the protruding root when it jumped and it tripped and fell!

I took my chance. I dived towards the beast, hunting knife in my hand, and ran the knife through the beast's skull. I pushed and it lodged all the way up to the handle. I could feel the knife go through it's brains like a cleaver goes through mutton.

It howled in pain and struck me with a left backhand. I was flung three yards away from it and I landed on a rock that hit me on my back. I cried out in pain.

I looked at the beast. It rose, shakily. And it stood on it's feet and steadied itself. It was an eerie sight. A beast like it standing in the backdrop of the rays of sunlight filtering in through the trees, with the handle of a knife sticking out of its head. It stood for a moment like that.

And it fell. Like a dry branch hitting the earth. Motionless. Still. Dead.

My strength drained away. I lay flat on my back heaving with relief. I had survived.

I was wrong today. Heroes do exist. They just aren't what we hear stories of, though. They aren't made of steel nor can they fly, nor do they have any super powers. They are normal human beings, like you and me. Heroes exist. And not just in fairy tales.

I am my own Hero.

- Vinaykrishnan.

The Hero (part III)

As a child, I always was told stories of how heroes would come in the nick of time, and save the world from being run over by evil. They would look handsome even after the bloodiest of battles, their battle scars and bloody noses only adding to their aura of courage, bravery and strength.

I always thought it true. I have carried this belief of heroes saving the day up to even now, as a young man. I'm 26, and I have lived in dark times. But my faith in them has never ceased, never wavered. Undoubtedly, I remained steadfast to my notions.

I couldn't be more wrong. There are no heroes coming now.

I look up to the eyes of the beast, glowering down at me. It's huge figure has blotted out the background, and I cannot see the sunlight cutting through the foliage and hitting the mossy and damp ground.

"Steady now, Viv," I say to myself. I did not want to do anything foolish. Let's just bid time now. See if there is a roll of the dice yet left. Some strange weaving of the web of fate that has spun in my favour.

I looked at the creature's feet, sinewy muscles culminating into large feet, with curved talons. 4 talons. Wicked. But beautiful. Even in an abomination, the Creator sprinkles beauty. If I were not fighting for my life now, I'd stand back and admire the lithesome creature. The perfect predator.

And something near it's feet caught my eye. A root of the oat protruded from the earth and the creature was standing above it with it's feet on either side of the root.

I had to take this chance. My only chance.

- Vinaykrishnan.

The Hero (part II)

"Get away, you foul!!!" I shouted. I couldn't even form a coherent sentence. My throat was all dry and I was waving my arms like a madman.

The beast did not even flinch. It's tail kept swishing from one side to another, balancing that huge torso. Muscles like no man has ever seen. Rippling, bulging. I felt they'd tear out of its skin.

I thought of Nicola. Her black hair, cascading on her bare shoulders. Her playful winks and her cute smile. I thought of the straw bed in her farm where we lay on a summer night, watching the stars and making love. Visions of unbridled joy. But these brought tears to my eyes.

The creature, hunched shoulders and outstretched arms growled slowly in its throat. Spittle formed near the corners of it's outstretched lips. Teeth bared. Almost in a smile.

I jammed my hands to the mossy floor of the forest, and tried to get up, my back rubbing against the bark of the oak.

I get up and gingerly test my sprained ankle. It hurts, but I can stand. I MUST stand. I have no chance against this beast on my arse.

My hunting knife in my hands, I flex my shoulders. I'm ready for its lunge. I know that if it lunges, I'll not make it. It's bigger, stronger and faster than me.

It will go for my throat or my heart. Two on one against this beast is a risky affair. One on one, I'd have to be made of iron to survive.

Where are heroes when you need them?

- Vinaykrishnan.

The Hero (part I)

The beast stared into my eyes. Red eyes, glowering with the pangs of hunger. And violence. And savagery.

I could do nothing. I was with my back against the oak trunk. Nowhere to hide. Nowhere to run. My sword was not in my scabbard. My hunting knife look like a paper cutter in my hands, not to talk of the beast in front of me.

I thought of my mother. She used to feed me rice and curd with her hand. I loved food best when it was from her hands. She was a great cook, a great mother. I loved her.

I thought of my father. He, was a man. He, was my hero. The way he'd tell me tales of the dark forests and how he won my mother's heart by saving her in some part of them. Every son loves his father. Every son wanted to be half the man his father was. I was no different.

The animal... no, half-man, half-animal, took a step forward. Claws flexing, teeth baring.

I could feel drums in my head. Maybe someone coming to save me! That would be most welcome!

But no. It's just my blood rushing through my ears. Throbbing. Pulsating. Electrifying.

Scary.

I always thought I'd be a hero when I'm in a fix.

I was wrong. This is no fairy tale. The damsel in distress is me. There is no knight in shining armour to save me. There are no heroes.

- Vinaykrishnan.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

I cried.

I was not born then. My mother says she had cried back then on her birthday. 25th June, 1983. Kapil Dev. Mohinder Amarnath. Some great cricket.

She cried again last night. As did I.

When Sachin strode out to play with Sehwag, we had a sense of awe about them. That no target is too huge while these two are at the crease. A God. And a lesser God. But Gods.

Then went Sehwag. Sachin looked in touch. But He fell too. Anti-climax before the end. I was amazed at how someone I do not know can affect me so much. I was angry. Really enraged.

But then two Delhiites came to the crease. And took us a distance. I had hope again before Virat fell.

Then came the master stroke. Cometh the hour, cometh the man. It takes guts to stand up and say, "I am your leader. I will take you to the end". Dhoni proved that he had it in him. Biblical, almost.

A grittier knock never has the world cup seen by a captain in the finals. Maybe, Da Silva in the 1996 finals. But no. Not of this kind. Dhoni played his heart out. He came out to the pitch, and he batted like there was no tomorrow. As if losing today, and his heart would stop beating. Clutched at his wicket with the same tenacity as a drowning man holds on to his last breath. But Dhoni held. And he emerged.

That stump that he picked up. I am taking the World Cup home. Awesome.

I was adrenaline-pumped then. Big time. I was laughing my ass off at everyone of the doubters. Everyone who ever said that India would not win.

But then something even more awesome happened. The kids carried Sachin on their shoulders and paraded. Sachin. The Man we all admire. The Man we all respect. The Man we all love. The Man who makes us believe in miracles, and in Gods, and in switching off our lives and switching on our television sets.

Sachin. Now He has everything. And He can now sit back and say, "I did what I had to do. But now, the time has come where I have Men I can trust to do my job."

He has been at it for 22 years. 22 YEARS.

Now, He can rest.

Thank You, Dhoni and Sachin. And all the others involved. You had to be the ones to make me cry. And I have no regrets.

Thank you for making me cry.

- Vinaykrishnan.